how do you afford your rock’n’roll lifestyle?

we aren’t die hard high fidelity or anything. we just like music. lots and lots of music. sometimes we go listen to live music. when my middle school friends were attending the cure and U2 concerts i attended billy joel’s river of dreams concert. let’s just say my concert going has much improved since then, but, i must be getting old. i prefer to attend concerts where i have an assigned seat. my days of showing up early to elbow my way to the front and then stand there for hours are probably over.

i also think i could give our most recent concert bands some advice:

dear fleet foxes,
i really like you and think it’s cool you are from seattle and do awesome harmonies and all. your baby lead singer is also named robin so that is cool. but why did i feel like it was 1972 watching you sing? p.s. all your songs kind of sound the same but they sound like crosby, stills and nash so that makes up for it.

dear wilco,
i’ve loved you ever since the sports producer who had a crush on me at channel 7 left me a burned cd filled with your music. i really enjoyed your documentary. the problem is, i truly only heart yankee foxtrot hotel. maybe i should have realized that before we spent $40 on tickets and drove 4 hours to spokane… or maybe in the future you should only play that album.

dear matt costa,
i’m sorry i didn’t realize who you were until you said your name at the very end. honestly, i think you are really cool and i would buy your music.

dear ryan adams,
i think your hair is greasy gross. maybe you perform best when you are crazy drunk but i prefer to hear you sing over your weird mumblings in the microphone. i guess i shouldn’t complain since my friend saw you in 2000 and you played with your back to the audience the entire concert… p.s. i guess the cardinals are good, but i like whiskeytown.

dear oasis,
when i was a lifeguard at perry pool (go prianhas!) the guard who cleaned the pool would always blast the wallflowers and oasis. i don’t mean to hurt your feelings but i thought they were lame bands. in 2004 i went on date with a boy who was fanatical about two things 1) his dislike of mayonnaise and 2) his love of your band. he burned me a cd one night and filled it with oasis, but it sounded different and i really liked it. (that is because noel* was singing.) oasis, i really think you should fire liam, even though he is your lead singer he stinks! noel is a much better singer. noel is also nicer and doesn’t spit on the stage or the audience. on top of it all, liam only plays a tambourine and not even for every song! oasis, please give liam the boot and promote noel!!

*despite christian’s clamoring, our first born** will not be named noel. it sounds too much like mole! and people may get confused and call him, “no-el” you know, like christmas….
**no i am not pregnant i just thought this would be an important issue to clear up sooner rather than later!


7 thoughts on “how do you afford your rock’n’roll lifestyle?

  1. >”Greatest bands”, after about 1978 or 79, don’t exist… so using the term “all time” is a bit numb…Crosby, Stills and Nash really stunk after Neil Young left…Wouldn’t that make him the second No-el (since The First Noel is already taken)?

  2. >I love wilco, too, but I could do with the extra jamming at the end of all their songs, especially in concert.And Noel is waaaay nicer than Liam. But they will never be better than the Beatles. What were they thinking??

  3. >Saw Fleet Foxes in Dallas this summer. They were incredible. Their harmonious vocals made me feel like I was floating in the middle of the room… and no, I was not on drugs at the time. Oh how I wish I lived in Seattle.

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