watch it spin round to a beautiful oblivion.

we each brought several household items to this marriage from our single days. one of my bigger contributions was a kitchenaid blender. i bought that blender in early 2006. i was preparing to move to small town virginia to report. it would be the first time since middle school that i’d be roommate-less.

i found a cute little studio apartment and needed a few household essentials. my reporter friend gave me a congratulatory gift card to bed, bath & beyond. i used every last cent of it on my stainless steel blender. a blender i promptly put to use making green salsa.

six years later and the blender has become christian’s milkshake making baby. he whips up any milkshake your little heart desires. well, except for mango strawberry. i repeatedly request mango strawberry and for some reason he says that flavor combo isn’t an option. so basically he’ll make you any flavor but that.

during one of his latest milkshake shows the trusty blender decided it had had enough. the blender’s demise made me start dreaming of the snazzy clear blender bobby flay uses. not christian. all he was thinking about was the receipt. the receipt for the broken blender purchased at the tyson’s corner bed, bath and beyond in 2006.

he wasn’t too amused when i died laughing. you see, if i did have that very receipt, we would be owed a brand spankin’ new blender from bed, bath and beyond. i informed him i did not have the receipt. he asked me to look for it. i told him i didn’t need to look for it. i knew i hadn’t saved it. who am i? a receipt hoarder christian?

i had just sifted through a bin from my dc life and found every possible ticket, stub and playbill. not a receipt among the scrapbooky stuff. “did you find the receipt yet?” he’d ask when he came home from work. it was a pretty funny joke. there was no way that receipt was going to surface.

christian stopped asking about the missing receipt and ordered the $7 replacement part. i guess i’ll have to inflict more damage the next time to score that see-through blender. and when i do, i’ll definitely file away the receipt.

 

——-
inside out, by eve 6

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9 thoughts on “watch it spin round to a beautiful oblivion.

  1. Soooo….. If you buy that frozen fruit mix at Costco, it has mangos and strawberries (and pineapple and some other frozen things) and if you blend those with a jar of home canned pears, it makes a tremendously delicious smoothie. If my kitchen ever decides to resurface out from under its whole insides being puked out onto every other surface, I’ll have you over and we can make some smoothies.

  2. We recently got a Blendtec from Costco- they have a great deal- and are obsessed! It grinds my food storage wheat- WTH?????!!!!

  3. I used to save every single receipt- filed in a neat little file by month. Then one year as I cleaned out the file I realized that in the last fifteen years of saving receipts I had never needed one. So I stopped saving most reciepts (except for big ticket items and a few other random things). Yesterday my sister in law asked me if I still had the receipt for a pair of shoes I picked up for her at our local Target four months ago. Sigh. And of course it is Target which has the worst return policy in the history of the world.

  4. I love how you crossed out receipt hoarder. Hilarious. Chris is also a receipt hoarder (and if we had any more space, he would also keep the original packaging for EVERYTHING). We’ve really got to introduce those two.

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